SAME TIME EVERY YEAR (1981) movie review

Same Time Every Year (1981) d. Lincoln, Fred J. (USA)

CAST: (in order of appearance)

Loni Sanders – Nicole (as Loni 'Haiku' Sanders)
Mike Ranger – Michael
Lynx Canon – Alice (as Jean Damage)
Paul Thomas – Robert
Tiffany Clark – Melissa
Michael Morrison – Jason
Ron Jeremy – Ed the Chauffeur
Herschel Savage – Tony (as Joel Caine)
Holly McCall – Jogger
China Leigh – Lisi
Lee Carroll – Blonde with Robert
Starr Wood – Liz (as Star Would)
Boo the Wonder Horse – Alice's Horse
Blake Palmer – Blond Car Mechanic
Jerry Wad – Brunette Car Mechanic
Phaery Burd – Girl with Jason (as Isolde)
Coral Cie – Anne
Kathy Harcourt – Anne's Friend

PLOT:
Ranger, Thomas and Morrison head off on a trip to their annual “lawyer’s convention,” leaving
their respective hot and horny wives Sanders, Canon and Clark behind with their home fires burning.  In reality, Thomas and Morrison are carrying on affairs and Ranger is hiring himself out to a stud service, but the guys don’t have the corner on the foolin’ around market.  That’s about it, plot-wise.  The good news is that viewers didn’t lay down their cash for a profound narrative – they want the goods and boy, do they get them here. 

SCENES OF INTEREST:

1. Ranger tells Sanders that good girls don’t do the fellatio thing, but he’s totally fine with a little reverse cowgirl action to send him on his way.

2. Across town, Thomas sneaks into Canon’s backdoor whilst loudly proclaiming his own prowess.

3. Morrison forsakes the most important meal of the day in favor of a kitchen quickie with Clark (but he looks like he’ll survive).

4. Savage the hired help gives Sanders some oral pleasure in the great outdoors, then grants her request for the full treatment as she climbs him like a tree.  Finally, she satisfies her presumably long-denied hunger for the man meat, polishing him (off) like a pro.

5. Chauffer Jeremy picks up jogger McCall, who takes him home to enjoy a little hot tub viewing session of her and Leigh self-pleasuring before they get down to some serious double tongue-tag-teaming. He works a little mustache magic on McCall before completing the job with his legendary tool, which trades off between Leigh’s luscious lips and McCall’s lady lips.

6. Carroll performs an enthusiastic, tongue-flicking striptease for Thomas to show her appreciation for the healthy hunk of metal laid on her finger.  She then commands his sorry ass to give her what-for (set to a crunchy electric guitar riff score), but he quickly shows her who’s boss.

7. Wood, our resident equestrian expert, hops in the saddle with Canon.  (No, really, on a horse.)  Then after minimally stretching Boo the Wonder Horse’s legs, the ladies dismount and spread their own for one another.  Riding crops end up places they probably shouldn’t.

8.  Clark heads to the auto shop to get her motor looked at and ends up between Palmer and Wad’s two hot rods.  They look under her hood, lube her up, and top her off with fluids.  (Guys, you’re supposed to top the fluids off…oh, never mind.)

9.  Burd and Morrison share a delectable feast, then get down to some serious dining. 

10. Ranger does a little extended exotic dancing of his own for the appreciative audience of redhead Cie and Brit brunette Harcourt.  (Apparently that big goofy smile isn’t as big a turn off as you’d think.)  But the gyrating really starts once the ladies join him on the shag carpet.  After some front and back oral thrills, the two ride the lone Ranger, with Cie taking the bumpier ride and Harcourt on cookie duster duty.

11.  Entertaining re-cap with the closing credits covering all the bases, faces and names.  Nicely done.

RANDOM THOUGHTS: 

That’s Mike Ranger, the incestuous son from Kirdy Stevens’ landmark 1981 Taboo sporting an awesome porn ’stache.

Is it giving them too much credit to assume Fred & Co. borrowed their title from Bernard Slade’s hit Broadway play and subsequent 1978 film starring Alan Alda and Ellen Burstyn?

Gotta love the jump cut between Canon finishing Thomas off by hand to Clark shaking up the orange juice container for breakfast.  That was almost artistic, Fred.

Okay, ten minutes in and we’ve already burned through three quickies.  Madness!

And then Lincoln pulls out the slow mo for Sanders’ backyard snacking.  Now you’re just showing off.

The three-way between Leigh, McCall and Jeremy is positively epic by comparison to the previous scenes.

Wow, following McCall’s real tah-tahs with Carroll’s ridiculously fake ones.  And the latter is mighty chatty by comparison – I think she’s given herself more lines than anyone else in the movie combined.  Somebody was trying to make an impression.

I’m sure I’m not the only one who was wondering just how friendly Canon was going to get with Boo the Wonder Horse, but those hoping for a little Emanuelle in America action will be disappointed.  All others will be relieved.

Fun Fact:  Of our two nameless car mechanics in the scene with Clark, blonde Blake Palmer has 400+ adult film credits to his name.  By contrast, brown-haired lad “Jerry Wad” has 1.  This one.

Palmer also appeared as Honey Wilder’s randy son in Taboo III, which means he ostensibly inherits Kay Parker from co-star Ranger two movies later.

Okay, again, the food orgy scene between Morrison and Burd recalls a similar famous scene from 1963 Best Picture winner Tom Jones.  Lincoln must have gotten to the flicks now and then.

THE SPECS:

DVD Release: Impulse Pictures
Run Time: 80 minutes
Release Date: February 12, 2013
Language: English
Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1 Anamorphic Widescreen
Format: DVD
Region: All Regions
Retail Price: $24.95